So, here we are again. The end of a year and the beginning of a new one. A period of time that happens every single year or every twelve months or every three hundred and sixty-five days. One more year or should I say one less year?
I always get a little sad at this time of the year. I don’t really know why. It is just a feeling that some part of my life has just ended and another one is about to start. However, it wasn’t always like this. I used to love time like this when I was just a kid. I remember that I had a lot of fun setting up the Christmas tree and staying up late trying to catch Santa Claus (I never did though). Furthermore, I loved watching the fireworks in the sky at the same time that the clock reaches midnight on new year's eve. Nowadays, I don't have those feelings anymore or at least they are not so strong as they used to be. Those feelings were transformed into memories. Good old memories that I carefully keep in my mind and revisit whenever I feel like. I wonder if there are others out there that do the same. I ask myself if this is part of becoming an adult.
I try to remember all the things that accomplished and all the things that I did not accomplish in the last year. In this process, I always get the feeling that I did not do enough or that I procrastinated a lot which leads me to that feeling of guilt. At the same time, I try to tell myself that this was not true and that I should not feel the guilt of being human, because that’s what human beings do, right? We spent a quite good time of our lives trying to reach some goals. Some of those goals we do reach. Some we don’t. Some we lose interest. Some are replaced by more important ones. Some are used just as a tool to have a false sense of control about our own lives.
In the end, it is more about enjoying the ride than reaching goals. Yeah, I know…you may have heard that sentence thousands of times before, but this does not mean that there isn’t a lot of truth in it. Actually, I think we should remind ourselves once in a while about that idea because it is easy to forget it. Anyway, I wish a happy new year to whoever is reading this. I hope you are enjoying your ride.